Friday, September 4, 2009

Since July

Every time I get on here, I tell myself that I really should update this thing more often. Right now there isn't much to talk about, as far as the adoption goes. My paperwork is ready to send to Ethiopia, as soon as the money comes in. From where, you might ask. Well, the answer is, I have no idea! But I know it will come in God's time, so I am not worried about it. Trust me, I have panic days, but most of the time, I am calm and collected. ha!

Since July, I have moved to a 4th grade class at school, after 6 years of 5th and 6th grade. And I was comfortable. Well, I cannot use that adjective anymore! I would say frustrated or frazzled would be better words for this year. I have a great group of children, and then a few that I wish would move. Every teacher has "those" children. And I was blessed with 5 or 6 of them. And when I move back up to 5th and 6th, I get these angels for 2 more years. I'm not sure what I did wrong as a child to deserve this punishment, but I know that everything happens for a reason, and they are in my room for some purpose that I clearly do not understand.

A week ago, my childhood home caught on fire in the middle of the night. To receive a 2 am phone call is not a good sign. The firemen did a great job of containing the fire-but it was in the upstairs. The upstairs filled with my childhood. Literally. Everything I had ever received as a child or teenager is still in that bedroom. Throughout the week, I have had to deal with this loss. While I did not live there any longer, I could always drive by and recall a random story from my youth. And now when I go by, I feel empty. I know those memories are not gone, and I know that it is not practical to think that memories would be made there again, but I had always hoped that this house would remain in our family. I don't know how that would have happened with my parents not married anymore, and me being on a teacher's salary, but I still had that dream. And I guess it was that dream that even allowed me to drive past the house. Now as I walk in and the roof is in my bedroom floor, and my sister's room has a complete view of the sky, that dream is gone.

I will forever treasure the Christmases with the living room full of presents from Santa. And countless hours doing homework at the breakfast room table. Or swimming and then jumping on the trampoline, in between Dirty Dancing or Clueless marathons. Or spending hours pretending not to look out the windows at the Martin boys. Or the many parties after football games, proms, or any other excuse to get together and crowd as many people as possible around Grandma's giant table.

If you are looking for my childhood, I know where it is. But it is much harder to recall when the house is half as tall.



About Me

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I am single, 30 year old teacher in Tennessee. I am anxiously awaiting a child from Ethiopia. I cannot wait to add this adventure to my life!